It's very important to surround yourself with like minded individuals. That way when great things happen for you they are able to share in your joy. When things aren't going so well they are there to support you and help you get to your next level. I think one of the best lessons I learned from my mother is; in her words "always follow your gut". You may refer to it as your intuition. When you listen to that "voice" or that feeling in your gut, that's your connection to God and it doesn't steer you wrong. But, we have a huge tendency to ignore that and then we say "I should have listened to my intuition." It works on people very well. When you meet someone you immediately get a feel for their spirit and whether or not they are meant to be in your circle. You can feel their genuineness and you know whether or not you want to include them into your list of friends. Sometimes you give people "the benefit of the doubt" because your spirit tells you they aren't really for you but you don't want to listen. And I'm sure 9 out 10 of you reading this knows you should have left them right where they were. So I came up with a list of 10 things to check for before knowing if you should let someone in your circle:

1. Is the person genuinely nice?

2. Do they compliment you?

3. Are they happy for you when you accomplish your goals?

4. Do they make you want to be a better person?

5. Do they encourage you?

6. Do they make you smile?

7. Do other people like being around them?

8. Do they share their dreams with you?

9. Are they open and honest?

10. Are they trying to get to their next level?

If you can answer yes to these questions then you surely have a person you can trust and believe in and hopefully someone you will develop a long lasting friendship with. I've often met people and "loved" them immediately. Their spirit just radiated love. I absolutely adore when that happens and those people end up making the most difference in my life. Always know this as well. Some people are here only for a season. You may meet the person that gets you to your next level but your next level may very well be their last level. Don't count it as a loss. Count it as God using people to get you where you need to be. Not everyone can follow you through every level of your success. Sometimes it's time to say "bye, bye". In the words of Joel Osteen sometimes you have to leave your safe zone and enter the faith zone." And sometimes that means leaving old friends behind.

You don't need money to survive. When you learn to live life from the perspective of enjoying every moment of it...everything changes. All the normal "rules" of society no longer apply to you. You are no longer caught up in the rat race because you are living as God designed us to live. I'm an avid believer that we are all born with talents that will allow us to make a living. The problem is, it's instilled in us from early childhood that those talents are to be used to get a higher education and go work for someone else doing things we DON'T like for a large paycheck. I personally think our innate talents are most times totally unrelated to working for a paycheck but instead should be used to service someone else. Joy comes from doing something you love but in the process, also serving others. We cannot all be entrepreneurs. But we can all be serving others in whatever field we work in. How often have you seen someone in a job where they totally enjoyed what they were doing and it changed your experience? Mine was the other day at a friend's restaurant. She has a young man that works for her waiting tables and he is excellent at it. He is very polite, gets everyone everything they need and seems to genuinely enjoy his job. I was excited just watching him and before I left I made sure to compliment him on his work ethic. Everyone wants to feel like they are doing a good job. We need to stop looking for money as rewards or as the means to an ends. When you are doing what you are supposed to do and serving others in the process, the money will come. When we decided to open our salon, we had NO money....I mean negative zero. But, we didn't let that stop us. We were passionate about what we were doing. We knew we had a great idea and we knew its what God wanted us to do. So we acted like we had money. We decided what we wanted for the salon, we figured out how much it would cost, we prayed about it and we talked about it to anyone and everyone we knew that we trusted. We had so many people that loved us, believed in us, wanted the best for us AND we had an unbreakable faith that God would provide. We started seeing miracles happen. People would call and say they wanted to give us money or that they wanted to gift us supplies for the salon. We bartered with people when we could and gave them gift certificates for future services. Did I mention we had NO money? lol. But I'm here to tell you that on the day our salon opened, not only did we have everything we needed, our schedules were completely booked and we were debt free. So, I'm speaking from experience. Were there times in the process where we doubted and were concerned because we had rent to pay or car payments? Heck yeah. But, we stayed faithful, prayerful and most important we encouraged each other that the struggle wouldn't last for long. Sometimes we would cry and then laugh about how one day we would look back to those broke days. And God hasn't stopped blessing us. And we haven't stopped telling people about his blessings. We are here to serve. Not only do we service people's hair, we serve them through nurturing their spirits because we love what we do. I have another close friend who recently came up with an amazing idea. He called me to tell me he woke up at 2 am one morning and couldn't let the idea go. God was speaking to him and before long all the details were laid out. He decided to do something he had never done before. He talked about it to people he trusted. Within 24 hours someone had offered him money to get his idea underway....and I'm talking 10 G's/10 stacks...ok, in laymen's terms, ten thousand dollars! A lot of you reading my blogs know me, you know my story but for those that don't, I just want to inspire you. You and I are no different. You have the ability to experience these things but you have to first have a burning desire to follow your dreams and to serve others. In the words of Zig Ziglar, "you don't have to be great to start, but you have to start to be great."

It's so easy to come up with excuses for why you can't do something. I'm too tired, I work too much, there's not enough time, I don't have any money, I just can't do that and the best one ever: the dog ate my homework. People, puh-leeze...... Do me a favor. Think of something you need to do and instead of making excuses of why you CAN'T, think of ONE....just one reason why you CAN.

You have to be willing to make sacrifices if you want a better life. I don't watch TV. (Except football!) People ask me all the time..."how can you NOT watch TV?" And they tell me about all these great shows. Because TV robs people of real life. I know people that spend 3-4 hours every night watching shows they "just can't miss." Those 3-4 hours I'm spending time with people I love interacting, talking, having dinner, writing, reading, working out or just thinking of ways to take over the world. Your life isn't getting any shorter. That's an average of 21-28 hours a week of wasted time and millions of wasted brain cells. If you want something different, you have to be willing to try something different. :)

Today's blog simply consists of a series of 2 word phrases that inspire me:

Love yourself

Be kind

Help others

Spread love

Keep smiling

Listen intently

Think positive

Be honest

Speak kindly

Laugh often

Do something

Eliminate clutter

Be intentional

Embrace excitement

Treat yourself

Take ownership

Experience happiness

Take trips

Give unconditionally

For as long as I can remember I've been a "big" girl. I've never known what it's like to shop in the "regular size" section in a store. I just had to hope that I could find renditions of the hot fashions I saw in magazines somewhere in my size. As depressing as it was at times, the bright side is that I became an excellent shopper. I would get ideas in my mind of what I wanted my style to be and I would look nonstop until I found exactly what I wanted. It's called determination and can be used in all aspects of our life. I would constantly complain that it wasn't fair I had to go through all that just to look good. But as i got older I realized it was about more than size. I have since lost weight but, when I turned 40 I decided to turn it up and not just lose weight....but get fit. I have recently hired a personal trainer and I must say, it's been an interesting adventure. There are days when my body does things it couldn't do just a few days before and I have my own little personal celebrations. The key here is 1. I made a decision and 2. I acted upon that decision. What decision will you make today and act upon that could possibly change your life?

What's more awesome than having friends that truly love you? Can't think of anything at the moment. I'm surrounded by some pretty terrific people! Most I wouldn't have had the opportunity to connect with if they hadn't started out as my clients. One in particular is Tony Burrus. Straight outta Cali......Tony is my dude! Our transition from client to friend was a slow one but when it happened; there was no turning back. Tony has become my go to person for bouncing off my crazy ideas. He's ALWAYS supportive and 10 times out of 10 he fuels my crazy ideas by helping me figure out ways to make them work even better. He's quiet and likes to keep to himself but when he talks to me all that goes out the window. lol He talks a mile a minute, listens attentively and always provides me with the right words at the right time. I know I can trust him and I'm glad to call him my friend. (He's probably reading this and blushing right now! lmbo) He's also an avid biker...SO, if you're into that sort of thing, check out his site: www.nocag.es (No, that's not a typo...he created that)

My latest crazy adventure on a list that grows and grows is that I have decided to start a band.....A Rock One. But there is one small problem. (A wonderful manager of Doubletree Hotel in Times Square told me once, "there are no problems, only solutions.") I cannot play any instruments and I cannot sing. Soooo, how in the world am I going to have a band you ask? All I know is that everything starts with a vision. So I created a vision in my mind and arranged to have a photo shoot with my favorite up and coming photographer, Mike Dickerson. I told him simply, "I want to shoot with a band." He arranged everything and within a matter of weeks....there I was posing in front of a real band. But, I wasn't just posing. I was imagining, dreaming, feeling what it felt like to be the lead singer of a successful band. Then, I did what I do best. I started running my mouth about my new band. Of course, I needed a name and members but that would all come in time. My bestie, Kelley Carboni-Woods who is a comedianne without trying actually ended up coming up with a name after we saw a not so promising performance from another aspiring singer. Immediately I loved the name.... I changed one word in it and my band was born. I ordered a website domain name, made a Facebook fanpage and created a Twitter account. One of our artist friends, Chadwick, stopped by for a visit and he actually came up with the album name and the title of the first two tracks. AND to add to the excitement, one of my Facebook friends whom I've never met in person (Tiffaney Moore Borgelin) randomly commented on one of my recent status update. (although I don't believe anything is "random"). When I went to reply to her.....I noticed something; she was a vocal coach. (I'm always having these kind of A-Ha moments!)

So I sent her a message to see if she could train someone that was "vocally challenged". lmbo!! She responded and in her response she said something that I shall carry throughout my future with my band and whatever other crazy ventures come my way. She said that one of the main requirements is "that you have a vision for your voice." And I thought, WOW.. in whatever it is that we do....we should not be running off at the mouth aimlessly but instead we should have a vision for our voice. Stay tuned for my voice. :)

I woke up at 2:45 this morning to a dream that my kitchen was on fire. Well, my grandma's kitchen in the house she used to live in and one of my friends, Inkera was there helping me put it out. When I woke up I realized it wasnt a kitchen at all but instead was in fact every muscle in my booty from working out with my personal trainer. As I searched for some Aleve and BenGay, I laughed at the fact that I have a personal trainer along with several other things in my life. If someone had come to me with a list of the things I have done and said you are going to do blasé blah, I woulda been like...."yeah, whatever". Here are some off the top of my head: That I would stop eating pork (20 years ago I would have fought you over a slice of ham), that I would be a hairstylist (I don't even recall doing my barbie doll's hair), that I would be divorced with no kids (I always wanted lots of kids), that I would have owned 2 businesses by the time I was 40 (still seems surreal)and that I would enjoy going to the gym. (OK, wait, I'm still working on that last one).. but considering I went from 1 minute on the elliptical to 45, I think I have a promising future. ;) It's definitely not about the destination but about the journey and this has been an interesting travel. There were times when I had NO idea where I was going but I learned to follow my instincts and God and that has in fact made all the difference. My friend Chris posted as his Facebook status today: If your life flashed before you, would you love it. I can honestly say "hell yeah." Every moment has been a stepping stone to the next adventure.

My writings often come to me at the strangest times.....tonight is no exception. Over the past few months I have not been abiding. I have let the messages slip through the cracks. But, tonight I could not let the words pass. As I took a long hot bath soaking in epsom salts and eucalyptus trying to recuperate from battling with a day of allergies and sinuses, the following words came to me. "In our society, one of our greatest struggles is that of transparency." We spend so much time hiding that we never are truly fully aware of who we really are. And in the cases that we are transparent, where does it get us. For me, I have encountered people who tell me my transparency is refreshing and that they admire my zest for life. But, they often stop there. Short of knowing what to say or do next. They put me in a box, on a shelf, as something to attain at a later date which often times saddens me because it makes me realize just how different I really am. Yes, of course, we should all strive to be different but when that "difference" makes you feel like an outcast, it's not a very fun place at all. When you are the one trying your best to save the world with optimism in a world full of pessimist, who is there to remind you? This is the time I play "Save the Hero" by Beyonce. In it the words ring so true. "Sometimes I wish someone would come here and just save me....save me from myself"